Tattoos arent just for guys~

This is my layout for the 1 hour sketch contest over at Creative Scrappers last night.. let me just say the *RUSH* you get from this kind of contest is out of this world! I love it. It really stretches my imagination and freaks me out man hahaaa, but I LOVE IT. I have loved this photo of Hunter for a while, was just waiting for the right time and the right elements to jump at me. And it reminds me of a few things that I have pondered upon lately.

As the title says.. tattoos arent just for guys. I, myself have 6 tattoos. I have been persecuted for these symbols that I wear on my body for forever. I have been complimented as well. But it is the persecutions that seem to stick. As does any kind of negative tidbit that is spoken verbally to a person. You are too fat/skinny, too pretty/ugly, too weak/strong, too emotional/not enough... and the list just goes on and on. As this rages inside our souls we also keep the negative in the subconscious and it sneaks out when least expected. We try to be strong, we try to control it, but to no avail it rears its ugly head!

This happened to me the other day. I was reading a post regarding a woman who had a challenge to photograph herself and do a layout about herself. I have never been one that wants to be in pictures... but this day and age.. with the internet.. people want to see just who it is they are talking to, so Ive loosened up a bit and let go of some of that and will give the occasional mug shot. But when asked to do a shoot and layout I almost always refuse. I dont want to be in the *spotlight* so to say. I dont want people picking me apart.... and I dont want to have to face the fact that Im picking myself apart as well. And then it happened... someone posted the other side... the unselfish side.... What about your family? What happens if you pass unexpectedly and there are no photos of you? What do you have that your boys will remember you by? I ended up going to bed that night bawling. I got to thinking.. Ive always wanted to know more about my Mom.. little details about her thoughts, her dreams and wishes.. and yes photographs as well... and I got to thinking.. although they are boys, they will probably want to know the same about me their Mom.
So- I made a promise to myself that I would do more writing and journaling, and possibly at some point do a *book of me*... Im thinking my boys will treasure it eventually. Im going to encourage their Dad to do the same. ---- Maybe you'll want to as well! :)